Having people over for dinner, or indeed any meal, is something I really enjoy, mainly because there are a few simple rules I try to abide by.
1. When people offer to bring something don't turn them down. You turn them down once they will continually turn up empty-handed. Every polite person wants to bring something. It also gives them something to do when they come in the door. If you're really all set for dinner and dessert drop a hint, "Something to have with coffee..." "A cheap bottle of something, if you've one on hand..."
2. Get a drink into people's hands as soon as they are in the door. The fastest way to get the conversation going quickly is to loosen the tongues with a tipple. I don't care if it is lunch, they want it, even if they pretend they don't.
3. Cook for the people who are coming, serve food that you know they will eat. There's nothing worse than going to a dinner where the food is fancier than you are.
4. If something is causing you stress about the meal, cut it. You don't have to provide a green vegetable, if you're having rice you probably don't need bread, certainly not bread that you have to bake from scratch.
5. If you are putting yourself through the ordeal of making something from scratch, make sure people know about it. When making a pie crust don't worry about making it perfect or the guests won't appreciate your trouble.
6. Whatever you do, make sure there is dessert. Dessert is the magic spell that erases all memory of the meal before it. Because of this (and an insistent sweet tooth) I generally spend more time and care on dessert than the main meal. There are many desserts that are a snap to make, and you need only make one.
7. I will not offer you dessert, and if you ask for "just a little sliver" I will give you a piece double the size of what you're thinking of and you will gobble it up anyway! Why pretend?
8. People will have what you have. This is a rule handed down to me by a friend who never entertains, but wise still. If you don't get soft drink they will drink water, if you don't get dip they will eat cheese. Only J-Lo will demand anything special, and as a result she won't get invited back.
9. Offer people seconds of things if you've accidentally over-catered. You don't really want half a cheesecake staring accusingly out of your fridge every time you open it. And if they don't take seconds, sneakily make them up a doggie-bag to take with them.
10. My favourite kind of guest asks for a recipe for something they enjoyed (not the whole menu mind you!) and a good host gets it to them within a week with every necessary tip to make it as well as you do. Don't be stingy.
